Wow, I can't believe 2016 has come to an end. It seems as if the year has just begun. 2016 was a year of growth and tests for me. This year I went on a mission to find Myself , to figure out who I am and what I want to be in life . I gained so much self confidence in who I am as a person. I used to have very very low self esteem but not anymore, now I know I can do ANYTHING that I put my mind to . Everyone should feel that way. I have learned so much this year and I also have so much to work on .
This year I learned about friendship. I learned that all friendships won't be easy , god places some people in your life to teach you lessons about others and even yourself. I'm a person who feels like I don't need ANYBODY! I feel I can be bad all by myself. I can not stand getting close to people at all , so when I feel as if I'm getting too close to someone I back off , I find any and every reason not to talk to them and to cut them. I put up a wall .
I have some friends that are like sister and brother, family, than they are a friend; and no matter how much we go through, how many times we fall out I couldn't imagine life without them. In 2017 I want to work being a better friend and letting people in . You can't make it through life alone.
I love my family dearly , and this year I learned more about the importance of family .
I'm not a person who shows a lot of emotion so a lot of times I don't like family functions. On my mother and fathers side of the family we have had important people in our life pass away , especially around the holidays; So when I see my family all together I get emotional , wondering what things would be like if our loved one was there. I even feel like we shouldn't be all together without them there. Sometimes I express that hurt in anger. So I have an attitude and take out that pain on the people around me . In 2017 I plan to work on being a better family member. I want to control those emotions. I've realized that our loved ones are in a better place and they would want me to be happy , to live life and enjoy my family while they are still living .
I have to let go of the past before entering 2017. Past situations, hurt ,friendships, and relationships. I hang on to the past wondering why somethings happened the way they did. I get caught up thinking about how things use to be and comparing them now . Things change , feelings change, people change too ( yes I quoted drake lol). I'll sit back and think of something that happened in 2012 and get alllll worked up and mad or upset. In order to move on and be happy you have to let the past be the past and even forgive some people for something's even if they are not sorry . You have to forgive people for you, not for them. People make mistakes and people change , so don't hold onto grudges you could miss out on something good.
I want to be a better Taylor all around . My relationship with god is good but in 2017 I want it to be better. I want to be healthier, I want to get in shape , eat better, live better. I want to mentally be better , more positive thoughts instead of negative ones . I deal with depression and anxiety so I want to get more help with that . I have so many goals and so many things that I want to achieve. In 2017 i plan to put my dreams in action, start making more moves . I'm claiming 2017 to be a good year . I'm going to stay focused on what's important and motivate myself . Blessed and have a safe a happy New Years.